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Wednesday, December 28, 2005

America…Fuck Yeah! 


How I managed to miss Team America: World Police is beyond me, but if you haven’t seen it, rent this movie immediately (make sure to get the unrated version). Quite possibly the funniest movie ever.

******

Barring the frog march or something of comparable magnitude, I’m going to take a break from blogging for a bit.

Happy New Year!

See you in ’06.

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Friday, December 23, 2005

And the Winner is…. Assclown! 




Congratulations, Big Guy

You’ve earned this.

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Whah Hapund? 


It’s the darndest thing.

How in the God damn hell can this be happening to this country?

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Thursday, December 22, 2005

Snowballs in Hell 


Imagine a world without Republican scum.

Oh, and spare me the talk of impeachment -- the DC cocktail weenie press “buzzword” of the day, delivered with the smirking unseriousness usually reserved for Michael Jackson coverage.

It’s an insult of epic proportions to even bring up that word in the current political/media environment.

The Republicans are going to impeach Bush?

I’d sooner expect a unicorn to fly out of my ass.

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Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Useless 




Go ahead, please tell me what Dean, as chair of the DNC, has done to stop this shit.

I’m all ears.

Note: The article linked above so masterfully encapsulates the basis for my anger and despair, I could simply post the text in its entirety and retire this blog.

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Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Michael Ledeen, Jonah Goldberg, and the 7 Steps to Anger 


Step 1

"Every ten years or so, the United States needs to pick up some small crappy little country and throw it against the wall, just to show the world we mean business."

- Michael Ledeen, holder of the Freedom Chair at the American Enterprise Institute

Step 2

Meet Michael Ledeen

Step 3

Meet Michael Ledeen again

Step 4

I've long been an admirer of, if not a full-fledged subscriber to, what I call the "Ledeen Doctrine."

- Jonah Goldberg, Editor-at-Large of National Review Online

Step 5

Meet Jonah Goldberg

Step 6

See Jonah Goldberg

Step 7

Meet Jonah Goldberg again

Rinse. Do not repeat.

*****

Optional Step 8

Meet Jonah’s Mom

Optional Ultra-Masochistic Step 9

See Jonah’s Mom

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Monday, December 19, 2005

Assclown: Special Presidential Fellatio Unit 




Jeezus H. Christ

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9/11: The Permanent Get-Out-Of-Jail Card 


Here we go.

Another week in the endless nightmare that is the BushCo era, where a lawless administration — with a huge assist from the mainstream media — is virtually immune to the consequences of its criminality as long as it invokes The Day That Justifies Everything.

But wait, you say. There will be an “investigation” and “hearings” about this matter after the first of the year.

An investigation?

Wow. That sounds serious.

I’m sure they’re all real nervous at the White House.

Hearings?

Oooooooooh. They are so busted!

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Saturday, December 17, 2005

And You Thought You Knew All The BushCo Monsters 




How did this sadistic fuck fly under the radar? — or at least the Smithantics radar.

That this vile creature slithers through the highest halls of our government is almost beyond comprehension.

This is a fucking joke, right?

Right?

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Friday, December 16, 2005

The Banality of Fascism 


In a functioning democracy, this would merit serious consequences.

But, of course, this is BushCo America.

This puppy will be lucky to make it to sidebar status on the Sunday wankfest.

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Thursday, December 15, 2005

Teflon 


So, are we going to have to wait until BushCo has shit on this country and the world for the full eight years before any of these “looming scandals” actually pay off?

Seriously, will these guys ever take real damage?

And I’m not talking about tanking poll numbers. I honestly don’t think second-term BushCo gives a rat’s ass about poor approval ratings.

I’m talking about this whole house of corruption and stagerring incompetence collapsing onto itself with the nation and the world bearing witness.

Anything less than impeachment and conviction are peripheral matters to me.

And we’re nowhere near that point.

This is a sucker’s game.

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Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Assclown 




Takes the presidential member into his mouth.

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Bride of Assclown 




And Queen of the DC Cocktail Weenie Circuit

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Speechify 


Jeezus Christ, the MSM bobbleheads are a docile bunch. BushCo’s strategy of trundling the imbecile out to the podium about three times a week to repeat the “freedom is on the march” Orwellian handljob is working like a charm.

If you watch cable and network news at all, you surely have noticed that Assclown and company are firmly back in the saddle with the administration.

They have no memory, no cognizance, no fucking shame.

And they're in love.

Brows furrowed, these sick groupies, spew nonsense about how “bold” and “complex” Bush is. They see pissing blood and treasure into the Iraq sinkhole as a grand Churchillian adventure.

Sick, sick people.

*****

On another note, I know I shouldn’t be giving play to the trolls, but how about this genius quote from the post below about the shipping of dead soldiers from BushCo's faked-up war as common freight.

“I'm sure you folks are gonna find a way to blame Bush for this.”

And this guy dresses himself?

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Sunday, December 11, 2005

Please Collect Your Dead at Baggage Claim 




So fucking bad it’ll make your head spin.

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Saturday, December 10, 2005

WIWC? 


Once in a while I find myself absorbed in the odd, hilarious, and often revelatory world of the Eschaton commentosphere. And with surprising frequency, some commenter posts something that slams home the fucking hypocrisy and injustice of the BushCo epoch. Here’s one:
Can you imagine Dwight Eisenhower's, or FDR's, or JFK's dalliances being noddingly kept off of not only CNN's front desk, but also the Director of the FBI's top priority list?

Jeez, they not only scooped up young Ms. Lewinsky off of the street, but questioned her like the goddamned Republic depended on her weeping answer.
Just think about the sad truth of that.

What If It Was Clinton?

See related: IOKYAR (It's Okay if You're a Republican)

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Friday, December 09, 2005

Have They Arrested the Bastards Yet? 


What a dreadfully boring week on the political front.

A scan of the blogosphere yielded nothing blogworthy today (e.g., Dick Cheney being yanked from his bunker by FBI agents).

Have a nice weekend.

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Thursday, December 08, 2005

Ford Hates Faggots 


This is not funny.

But this frigging hilarious.

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Assholes 


Couldn’t agree more with this.

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Plame On 


Given the vast complexity of the case and the potentially glorious payoff, I suppose it’s unreasonable for me to be annoyed with the murky world of the “CIA Leak Investigation,” but, dammit, I am annoyed. The mosaic of timelines, the rampant speculation, and the frequent statements of certainty (again, based on speculation) that this thing is going to explode any second now are mentally and emotionally draining. It’s a perpetual tease, and Libby only got us to first base as far as I can tell.

Anyway, there are at least three blogs devoted pretty much exclusively to the science of “Plameology.” Here's one of them, which links to other Plameology sites. They're all atwitter today. Dive in if you care to. Let me know when the frog march begins.

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Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Money Down a Blood-Filled Toilet 


Yeah, it’s an offensive image. But let’s talk about what’s really offensive.

Murtha, bless him, is not on the wussie list.

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Wussies 


Frightened, cowering, hand-wringing, vacillating, election-losing, pathetic wussies.

And sorry to break ranks with some of you guys, but I place Clinton and Obama squarely in the ineffectual wussie camp. Soaring rhetoric means nothing when your voting record is pure Rethug Lite, and when you patently refuse to stand up to BushCo in any meaningful way.

Apart from a few momentary and fleeting impersonations of vertebrates, the Dems continue to quiver in post-9/11 paralysis, terrified of reprisal from Dick Cheney’s flag-wrapped minions.

I understand that politics is the art of compromise, but when the political “center” moves about four miles to the right and the Dems allow themselves to be dragged along, that is unacceptable to me.

Reid, Kerry, Clinton, Obama, and, yes, even Dean are doing a cosmically shitty job at presenting a clear alternative to the Worst President Ever. How in the fuck does someone with even a molecule of political acumen fail in that task?

FDR, Truman, and Kennedy are rolling in their graves.

The current crop of Dems need to tell the truth and let the chips fall where they may, but they are on the leashes of their political consultants, who preach the gospel of suicidal ambiguity and risk-aversion.

Infuriating.

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Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Just Wow 




I found this picture at Fried Wire. It pretty much defies comment, but go ahead.

I also found this at Fried Wire. The link was accompanied by the question:

“Why is he all bulked up like an orange Incredible Hulk these days?”

Hard laughter.

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Rethug 




WTF?

This is the frontrunner (by a longshot) for the Democratic nomination in ’08.

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Sunday, December 04, 2005

My New Life 


Hey, everyone!

Check out this profile of a group I’ve decided to join.

I guess I’m off to DC!

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Friday, December 02, 2005

Clusterfuckistan 


The smell of victory.

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Gonna Rip Cheney’s Nuts Off with Her Bare Hands 




Buh- bye, Dick.

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Thursday, December 01, 2005

Breaking: Bush Lied 




I’m shocked — shocked, I say!

Watch Republican hack John Warner squirm about it. Painful.

What an asshole Bush is, constantly hanging his allies out to swing in the gale force of his lies.

Worst. President. Ever.

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Let’s Hate on Reagan 




Just cuz he was such an evil bastard

First check out this pop-up window developed by our excellent comrade over at Fried Wire — a site that should be viewed daily.

And here’s a post I put up back in June 2004, shortly after the vile bastard expired.

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Withdraw. Impeach. Convict. 


Any elected official (Democrats very much included) who does not acknowledge this undeniable truth and support the recommendation therein

Is

Failing

This

Country.

Enough of the hand-wringing, the nuance, the parsing, the avoidance of the undeniable truth.

Iraq is an unmitigated disaster. We have to cut our losses now. The idea that a stable and secure democracy with emerge there at American gunpoint is a complete fantasy.

Yes, god dammit, it’s going to be ugly. The place will likely descend into full-blown civil war that rock the entire region.

That is the monumental crime of BushCo.

They kicked open the hornet’s nest, and there is no turning back.

Cheney and his band of think-tank criminal lunatics totally fucked the world, and dumping American blood and treasure on the problem will do nothing to fix it.

Too late.

Game over.

Merry Christmas.

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Fascist Drug Addict Supports Kidnapping of Christians 




Unless, of course, I’m taking his statement out of context.

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