SmithAntics

A true story from guest poster Christiaan Havelaar.

While out walking the dog the other day, I saw something that is still puzzling me. About a block away from where I was waiting for the dog to drop some Cosbys, I saw someone in a green Saturn park near the corner of 22nd and O. Nothing out of the ordinary except that it looked like Steveo’s car so I was checking it out to see if it was him. This guy gets out of the car and I could swear that it was Steveo. Short blond hair, tall, pasty white legs. I was about to yell out his name to see what he was up to but the guy runs over limp-wristedly to the corner and is impatiently looking around, obviously waiting for someone. I start to walk closer to go say hi and a beige car pulls up with some hipster-looking guy driving. The guy who I swear looks like Steveo jumps in the car, lays a huge, slobbering kiss on the guy driving, and then they speed off in the opposite direction of me as if I was seeing something that they didn’t want me to see. I stood there playing the scene over in my mind in disbelief of what just went down. Maybe I don’t know my friends as well as I thought….maybe it is better that I don’t. Maybe Steveo met someone special at one of his shows at the Distillery or something? Did I catch him in the middle of a secret rendezvous with his new man-lover? I don’t know. All I know is what I saw. You always hear about married folks going to bat for the other team out of nowhere, I’ve just never known anyone who has done that. Steveo…..is there something you want to share with us?